just minishorts.

Prone to incessant ramblings, here she goes again.

Random Thought #1
I was surfing the net, and logged on to one of my favourite haunts, found this link and thought it was awfully weird but very often true.

i write every poem about him. whenever i see a building site, i think of him, and i sometimes hope that i will see him. everytime the phone rings, i pray that it is him. i want to spend every moment i can with him. he's the most wonderful, intelligent, kinda, and beautiful boy i have ever met.

but i don't love him.

Random Thought #2
I feel like sneaking pages of Holy Blood, Holy Grail right now, but I'm not supposed to because otherwise, I'll never get around to finishing whatever's left on my table. I think I'm becoming obsessed with writings on the occult recently.

Random Thought #3
I am SO BLOODY BROKE. My purse has got a hole so big, and it's started to burn right through to my bank accounts. Splurging is good therapy for the soul, but its extremely bad on the pocket. At least, when you were younger, and earning money wasn't remotely in the plans, you wouldn't think twice about spending your parents' money. But now… now… when I go out with Mum for dinners, for lunches, it's all on me! When we go shopping, her clothes are on me! And I don't have a scholarship for my Master's degree, so that's on me as well. One of these days, I believe, the household bills will be on me too. Put those aside, I still have the little luxuries I want to access myself to. Which leaves me temporarily bankrupt.

And Christmas is coming up. Plus I need to save up to 7k so that I'll be able to spend comfortably for my annual holiday next year.

If I reject your invitations to parties, especially those with booze and gift-exchanging sessions, you'll know why.
If I reject your invitations to dinners, especially those with cookouts and BBQs, you'll know why.
If I go to mamaks and settle for an RM1 glass of Limau Panas and continue to complain about how hungry I am, you'll know why.
If I do NOT send out any x'mas cards, you will know why.
If I still owe you money and tell you I'll pay you back later, I mean later. Don't even hope for me to give it back to you by the end of the year.
My paycheck's 3 days away but I've got to save at least half of it if you really want nice pressies from me.

That said, all of the above prolly won't apply after a while, because I'm horrible at keeping accounts. And I'll be spending again.

Random Thought #4
I seem to be constantly struggling to decide whether I'm living a satisfyingly admirable life, or the not-so-enviable life of a nerd. Someone asked me if I were a journalist, but I wasn't in time to tell her: I wished. I edit sub-quality exam papers for a reputable company! For a song! It's a joke! I kid you not! Gah! And at the rate things are going (believe me, there are A LOT OF THINGS happening in my life right now), it doesn't look as if my life is getting more glamourous.

When young, I wanted *damn wanted* to become a reporter on CNN… it got out to the entire faculty, and I knew in hushed whispers behind me, there were little wannabes (oh yes, Narcisscus was reborn as minishorts) who would mutter under bated breath, 'There, she wants to be a TV reporter one day.'

So much for one day. One *out of the idea* day.

Since then I've seen 3 friends walked right into the entertainment industry and started hosting their own TV shows!!! And me? Me? I'm a boring old book editor whose life revolves around counting print runs and telling people that their concepts don't glue.

If things do pull through, it won't get anymore interesting. Nada.

The job's exciting though. Always wanted to be in publishing. So, kinda got what I wanted. Not what I'd imagined though.

Random Thought #5
I seem to have overwritten again.