Rapunzel Speaks 2: That famous long hair of mine
Mother said I was born a ravishing beauty. And I had the longest hair in the whole wide world. It was gold, and if I went out into the sun, it would shine like a very huge sheet of gold leaf. It was THAT fantastic.
It wasn't easy taking care of my hair, though. Every week (I don't wash it every day) I would use up almost half a bottle of shampoo, and over one bottle of hair mask just to keep it soft and comb-able. Even applying the serum (try Liss Extreme, I swear by it) took Mother and me over an hour, and all the hair care products cost Mother a bomb. Mother kept asking me to cut it off, but all the stares from the Ah Bengs around town gave me orgasmic pleasure, so yeah, I didn't listen to her.
It was just a short punishment! I wasn't actually locked up in the tower for months, it was only for about two weeks because I had tried to shoplift some haircare products from the saloon and Mother promised the hairdresser that I would be severely punished. So yes, I was grounded, and it was hell of hassle to live in that damned thing.
First of all, no ASTRO. Not even TV. No DVD players either. No telephones. No radio. And the worst of all, NO INTERNET. Gosh it was fucking boring ok, stuck up in that tower which was quite luxurious with a huge bathroom complete with a bathtub big enough to fit three (otherwise there wouldn't be a place for me to soak all my hair in I guess) and a huge bed with cushions filled with down. See I'm a princess, even when I'm grounded I get to sleep in velvet covered luxury.
But it was royally boring to live in there as well, plus, I had ONLY ONE tiny weeny window to look out at, and the tower was as high as a coconut tree. Wait. It was taller than a coconut tree.
At first Mother wanted to install a ladder to climb the thing. Then she realized, I would have been able to climb down it, and it just wouldn't do for grounded princesses to run away from punishment. Now what happened after that was an utter horror for my beautiful hair. That BITCH, I shouldn't call her that but hell, if you met someone who used your hair as a climbing rope you would be mighty pissed too eh? But what to do, Mother says something and you've got to listen, so she would come every day to the bottom of the tower and intercom me, 'Rapunzel, rapunzel, let down your long hair.'
And she would fucking climb up the tower via my braids. She was thin, so my hair could at least take her weight, but I think she snapped many strands in the process, that fucking bitch. But at least Mother was company, without TV, Radio and Internet, life can be a horrible bore, and she took to making her daily visits a time for mother and daughter to bond.
Except, I thought the punishment period was far too long. So. Well. There's that. Tell you more tomorrow. Got to go see my new wedding dress.
Previously on Rapunzel Speaks:
RS 1: My name and how I came to be
May 6th, 2005 at 7:38 pm
I love this, it’s really really funny
You know it kinda reminds me of Shrek 2 where all those little fairy tales got parodied in some shape or form. I wouldn’t be surprise if that had inspired you to write all this.:mrgreen:
Keep them coming…
May 7th, 2005 at 9:03 pm
you will be surprised because i was not inspired by shrek. if i were inspired by shrek, i would have been writing this since last year, but this just started about a month ago. i’d invite you, dear eddie, to read the history of why and how i’m rewriting the stories, and it has NOTHING to do with any box-office cartoon whatsoever.
(if i’m bitchy its because i’m in a shitty mood).
anyway thanks for loving the stories
May 11th, 2005 at 9:30 am
[...] e busy in the nights. Previously on Rapunzel Speaks: RS 1: My name and how I came to be RS 2: That famous long hair of mine
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[...] back later. Promise. Previously on Rapunzel Speaks: RS 1: My name and how I came to be RS 2: That famous long hair of mine RS 3: About the silk rope RS 4: Why Mark
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May 12th, 2005 at 11:26 am
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May 16th, 2005 at 10:10 am
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May 16th, 2005 at 10:14 am
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May 16th, 2005 at 10:16 am
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