just minishorts.

22 Responses to “How minishorts is the idiot”

1. suanie Says:
   May 24th, 2005 at 10:06 am

   nah I think it’s called loyalty

2. kimberlycun Says:
   May 24th, 2005 at 12:20 pm

   it’s always interesting (and reassuring) to discover people with suspicious characters

3. Anonymous Says:
   May 24th, 2005 at 2:52 pm

   I think ‘friends’ that talk bad, gossip about and generally try to mess things up between couples all in the name of being ‘concerned’ are nothing but hypocrites that don’t really care for you at all.

   This is especially so when they comment about something they did not experience themselves but rather through what they ‘heard’… It’s unfortunate that there are always such shallow people around our group of ‘friends’.

   Such experiences often remind us that in life we meet a lot of people but it’s through experiences and time that we separate out the ‘friends’ from the ‘acquaintances’.

4. AWM user Says:
   May 24th, 2005 at 11:47 pm

   If I open up Pandora’s Box for saying this… too bad… cause I don’t log on often enough to read the remarks or posts that are probably going to disagree with me.

   … and for those others who are going to get indirectly pissed off IF this Pandora’s Box opens… I apologise to you. I acknowledge my assessment of the situation is only as good as what I have read. If it is flawed, I do apologise… my opinion is based on what I read.

   I read the chat log… I think there might have been something genuine about it… but because “you” were on the attack the “person” went into defensive mode… the entire message got screwed up. There are ways to handle a situation like that… not everyone may be as “open” as you are and publish everything they think or chat with other people about. That doesn’t mean they are wrong… doesn’t mean they are right either (vice versa). I believe the minute you said you would put it up… it all went south. The discussion was no longer constructive… the entire meaning just vanished into thin air.

   So here it is… I think, you don’t listen enough.

5. dannyFoo Says:
   May 25th, 2005 at 10:12 am

   If only very woman in the world actually listened properly before reacting, I think that might solve problems. But in the end, having something without some downs might just be plain boring.

6. minishorts Says:
   May 25th, 2005 at 10:17 am

   There are two ways to do this, and one way deserves listening, the other deserves nothing.

   ‘hey, i have something to tell you, and you know, it might hurt, but it would be good if you could listen me out first. i think your boyfriend is quite too haughty for my liking ‘

   as opposed to

   ‘hey, ur current boyfriend is a total snob. why in the world are you with him?’

   now which would you listen to?

   like suanie said, it’s called loyalty, and sometimes, you need to be blind in being loyal, especially in occasions like this. some things are just not worth listening to.

7. percolator Says:
   May 25th, 2005 at 11:03 am

   “… I think, you don’t listen enough.” quote/unquote AWM, in short.

8. james Says:
   May 25th, 2005 at 11:20 am

   “you need to be blind in being loyal” - You mean like, blind faith? Hehhhehehh… sorry, couldn’t resist.

   But seriously, just because Concerned is a little tactless, a possibly sorely lacking in eloquence, doesn’t mean he’s completely full of shit, you know? Not completely, anyway.

9. minishorts Says:
   May 25th, 2005 at 11:52 am

   percolator: No, I don’t. Not when commentors people are rude.

   ***

   james: almost like blind faith, but not exactly, when we’re talking about a living breathing being who obviously cares for me (otherwise he wouldn’t be a boyfriend). hehe… yeah i agree that Concerned is not exactly full of shit.

   but he was terribly rude, and pray tell me, what would you do if suddenly your wife’s acquaintance rang her out of the blue and the first thing he tells her is, ‘you know your husband is a total snob. why in the world are you married to him?’

   Obviously I could choose not to post the chat. But I chose to blog it, and obviously that act alone is wrong to many, it is an act of what you may term ‘irresponsible’. But most readers and bloggers always forget that blogging isn’t exactly THAT big a phenomenon, and MOST of my friends don’t even bother about blogs, much more the fact that I blog, and I’m minishorts etc. Am I damning Concerned? This is not the first time I’ve published instances of how ‘concerned’ some ‘friends’ can be. Neither am I the first person to slander friends on my own personal blogs. Even more subdued bloggers have been more explicit than I in our attempts to de-toxify ourselves off the leeches in our lives.

   I’m sure you’ve met the helpful ‘Good Samaritan’ once in a while. And very often their good intentions are not welcome.

   This person is completely protected, for now, because he doesn’t know I blog, and his name is not published. If he sees this post, it may not be a bad thing either. Good for him to know how rude he was anyway. If it warrants a sorry from him, obviously I’ll listen, and perhaps yes, then it will benefit my relationship.

   Ironically, it HAS benefited my relationship in a way. Obviously I told my bf the whole script, and I let him see the whole chat (which you guys have not been shown), and obviously we discussed things over, we talked about our friends, and obviously I was reprimanded in a way for posting things up, like this. But Anonymous was right, a person who tries to mess things up between a couple is better off not doing anything at all. Eric would have appreciated it more if he were approached personally , rather than have his gf be approached by someone who is trying to give his ‘kind’ piece of mind towards the relationship, hoping to ‘help things out’.

   But I’m sure you know what I mean.

10. AWM user Says:
    May 25th, 2005 at 10:50 pm

    if your stand is finite that you will only listen to people who can format their criticism, feedback and comments in a way that you like… i think you are going to miss out on a lot of things that people are trying to “say” to you.

    i think you are strong, opinionated and you are a very open person. You are open outbound. You share a lot of what is in your head. However, from what I read from time to time… i feel that you are not as open to accepting “stuff” inbound.

    Sorry had to use “stuff” because I don’t know how else to describe it.

    some people are rude without knowing it. I am not sure whether it is the way they were raised or the birds-of-a-feather who they flock with. they are just “memang” like that. besides politeness is relative… from one person/group to another.

    as the host here, please do correct me if you think I am wrong… I do not mean to be rude. I’m also just sharing what is in MY head the best way I know how.

11. minishorts Says:
    May 26th, 2005 at 8:20 am

    AWM: I believe there is nothing wrong in ‘listening to people who can format their criticism, feedback and comments in a way that you like’… obviously this is a practice that most people do practice, whether or not they choose to admit.

    BTW i don’t think you are rude. you have always been a constructive reader, and when you comment, i take your words to heart and ponder on your words.

    you are right regarding the ’some people are rude’ thing. obviously these people will meet with people like me, from time to time. i choose to think that, if i behave in a way that tells them, ‘look if you have something to say, say it properly, don’t just barge into my privacy and attack the people i love in that manner,’ obviously i will listen.

    i find that it is easy for observers and outsiders to pull things out of their hats and say at will. now just so happen the person that is in topic is my boyfriend, and hence it is easy to say, ‘hmmm what he’s saying is worth listening to but since you’re so opinionated that you want people to be polite to you first only you’ll listen, then you might just miss out on the points worth listening to.’

    change ‘boyfriend’ to sister (not that i have any). would it be any less, politer? If Concerned went, ‘Hey, your sister is a total snob, why in the earth are you not telling her off?’

    i would still behave in the same way.

    do you get where i’m going to?

    this is the same reason why we are given brains, and taught lessons in manners. if you have something to say, say it properly, and you will be attended to. as for me, what i did was move the conversation into a lighter note (you don’t see this because i only took out the early parts of the discussion), and then we talked properly. most people wouldn’t even bother.

    then again, most people wouldn’t post the chat up. my actions denote my feelings, and yes, i was deeply offended. obviously that right to be offended is mine.

12. AWM user Says:
    May 26th, 2005 at 9:43 am

    well… I agree that what you say may apply to most people. however, I have come to know of some obnoxious people who turned out to be really nice on the inside… which is much better than being nice on the outside but rotten on the inside.

    I run a small business and over the years I’ve had to put up with a lot of crap from clients. If I re-acted in every situation… I’d have to close shop by now. With a bit of patience… and ability to calm them down… over the years, I’ve learnt that these rude guys aren’t always bad guys.

    they will remain rude lah… because its so deeply engrained into their way of life… no single person can change them. I feel that by not only limiting myself to liaising with people with the same qualities… my birds-of-a-feather group has grown… and I know flock with other strange birds.

13. AWM user Says:
    May 26th, 2005 at 9:58 am

    soz typo… last line was supposed to be… and I now flock with other strange birds.

14. minishorts Says:
    May 26th, 2005 at 10:13 am

    HI AGAIN!

    If I re-acted in every situation… I’d have to close shop by now. With a bit of patience… and ability to calm them down… over the years, I’ve learnt that these rude guys aren’t always bad guys.

    Agreed.

    And I think you know really what I meant in the posts, and my comments thereafter. Why do you jump to conclusions and say that ‘I do not listen enough?’

    I’d say you were too quick to assume, based on that post alone, that I do not listen enough. As well as Percolator, although I feel Percolator was quick to jump on your more polite comment, and picked it up, as if he were trying to reinforce something that i don’t already know… How very clever, but his originating from a mudpond sort of justifies this atroxious behaviour, i suppose.

    Anyway, I digress and back to you AWM,

    Part of a chat, your privilege to view, is presented to inform my readers that ‘urgh some people are so damn rude’.

    The truth is, yes, so my boyfriend sometimes can be a snob. Yes, that sort of suggest he’s rotten outside to some people, but why must we assume by the cover that he’s a snob, hence ‘y on earth are u still with him?’

    Sure, Concerned meant good, is good at heart, but if I allowed him to continue with his attack stance, I doubt his comments and the discussion would have been constructive enough. Took quite a bit of ‘patience and ability’, as you said, to calm him down.

    How do I calm people down. The above was an example. Not necessarily the way you liked it to be, but worked, nonetheless.

    How did it work? Obviously that’s none of anyone’s business but mine (now isn’t this a rude statement). Do ponder, and think about it. I may be younger, less experienced in terms of work, but it doesn’t necessarily mean that your observations are more acute.

15. AWM user Says:
    May 26th, 2005 at 11:18 am

    Age has nothing to do with PR, maturity, responsibility and eaten-more-salt and all that stuff. I don’t believe in it. So let’s not make that a factor. Younger or older everyone has different things to offer the world.

    My comment was primarily based on the chat log… but not entirely. It probably comes from an array of things I’ve read so far.

    It is impossible for anyone to truly know someone through online communication. Some of our colleagues and neighbours we see them everyday and STILL don’t know the real them. Hence, we develop our own opinions and ideas based on what we know, heard or seen about them.

    … my comment was no doubt based on the data/information which I have gathered about you from what I have read.

    My opinion more or less still remains. Maybe you’ve taught me a bit about myself. I’ve learnt that I am guilty of judging people more than I thought I did.

    … you have the gift of language. Using that you can overpower many people. Your pen and tongue is much mightier than the sword. Percolator, might be a personal friend and what you said about him/her might be something that goes way back to school days. However, if you keep overpowering people with your gift… you will destroy the things that people are trying to say to you.

    Why not ask Percolator to reinforce his/her thoughts by expanding the discussion. I’m not saying you don’t. From what I know about you, you are very open to dissecting situations and topics. However, why not take a softer approach?

16. minishorts Says:
    May 26th, 2005 at 12:56 pm

    AWM: I think I am already. I don’t know Percolator personally. I know he has a blog though, this knowledge travels fast.

    In my intro to minishorts.net, I’ve said to readers and visitors, ‘you’re actually not welcome here, but because I’m nice I always leave you a place to say what you will.’

    In an open discussion panel, like a forum or any other medium, no one is empowered with the veto power to say, ‘Well you say this, but I think this, and yes you’re right.’ I am the owner of minishorts.net, and obviously, some kind of veto power lies in my hand. Fortunately, like you said, I have the gift of words, and in that manner, I can twist words (even commentor’s words) to my advantage. But that is what makes me intriguing, is it not? And it is also the reason why you’re coming over again, and again.

    Observing Bloggers, AWM, one of many includes me, should make you realize that there are not many, like you said, as open as I am to discussion. I’m not bragging. I can choose to say, THIS IS MY BLOG AND I WILL DO WHAT I LIKE, which is, in essence, the unspoken rule that most bloggers/blog-readers abide to. That rule is in action here, only not explicitly so, because I choose not to practice it so blatantly.

    What is a hard approach vs a soft one? Hard and soft are at two ends of a continuum. Values like this are subjective to human perception. I say my approach is soft. But you opt to call it hard. Some will agree with me, others will agree with you. But who is right? There is no right or wrong, in my world. No absolutes. Hard or Soft, is a matter of perception.

    So BACK to our friend from the Mudpond. You judged wrong again, AWM, I don’t know him personally.

    He chooses to come in ONCE in a blue moon, chances upon posts that he feels desires his intellectual (or not so) piece of mind, and say what he wills. I don’t mind conversing with readers who say something sensible, it makes me tick, it makes reading this blog fun, and it makes me want to continue to write more ‘controversial’ entries like this.

    But when the occasional chicken opts to stroll by and clucks a little expecting attention, well, I guess I’ll scatter a few grains here and there, and see what happens. There’s nothing else I can do, except wait.

17. AWM user Says:
    May 26th, 2005 at 1:19 pm

    Well since we’ve reached the point of the discussion whereby we acknowledging that right or wrong, soft and hard… is just a point of view… and is all relative… from one person to the next…

    I guess there is nothing much else that can be said…

    “But that is what makes me intriguing, is it not? And it is also the reason why you’re coming over again, and again.”
    Personally… no. That ain’t it. I’ve got other reasons.

    

18. minishorts Says:
    May 26th, 2005 at 1:23 pm

    come come. don’t keep raping my comments systems. we can talk over e-mail. do mail me: minishorts[dot]gmail[dot]com. it’ll be nice to continue this conversation and get to know each other better.

    if you’re ready of course.

Leave a Reply