Literary Discussion: The Little Mermaid
The little mermaid was a greedy little thing. She had almost everything under the sea, but it wasn't enough. She had trinkets and more trinkets and a pretty room to boot. She had a clown fish and a crab for best friends and she could feast on all the seaweed in the grounds around her little water-hole all day long, but it wasn't enough.
She was a princess already but all these still weren't enough.
But let's go back to how come the little mermaid was so frigging ungrateful for all the riches she had.
Mermaids and mermans are sad in that way. Like, yeah they have half human tops and half fish bodies. Poor things I tell you. Which means they can KISS and do lots of things with their hands and breasts and human-like parts. But they miss out on the good parts.
You know kan, how fish breed. Mermaids breed like fish. They sort of do a constipated face thingy, and then excrete a number of unfertilised eggs. Then a merman would come over and do the same constipated face thingy, and excrete some semen (I dunno what it's called, seriously) and voila, the eggs would be fertilised. THAT's how they have babies. Sad, right?
So imagine if you're a merman. Lessay you found this babe mermaid, you fall in love or something and your hormones overshoot. You live in water, and obviously its damn sexy to kiss underwater and all that. You get to massage her skin in water, and they all wear little clam shells as coverings for their breasts. Damn easy to take out some more, just snap, and these things will float away. Somemore after making out it would be very difficult to find those clam shells cos they just float away, so you have a swimming naked mermaid whose only coverings for those darn nipples are her long long hair… and even that will be waving all around and so you get a 'now you see them now you don't' visual effect on those bouncing-in-the-water boobies…damn hot right?
So you take her into a private place behind some seaweeds, and this is like the MOST romantic make out place under the sea got sand got water and all that romantic stuff, and you kiss, you slobber, you grovel, you suck, you lick, you do all the necessities, and just as you wanna 'touch down' go down there… you realize.
Fuck, she doesn't have a cunt.
YEAH. Super potong stim, right?
So if you were a mermaid, and one day you found out that not only do humans kiss, suck nipples fondle breasts and etc, they get to play with everything that hides between the legs… how would you feel?
Envy would be a very, very mild word.
SO NOW, COULD YOU BLAME THE LITTLE MERMAID FOR WANTING TO BE HUMAN?
I wouldn't.
Same reason I don't understand why little girls like to dress up as little mermaids and pretend to have a huge fish body instead of going around being grateful that they have legs and that meowing thing in between instead.
Like I've said so many times, we keep wanting more when we really should learn how to be satisfied with things we already have and make the best out of them. Having human nature is so sad sometimes. We ought to be glad we're human and not mermaids, seriously.
June 6th, 2005 at 11:20 am
seawitch: why do you want to be human
mermaid: so I can make out with that biggus dikkus everynight!
seawitch: I will make you human on one condition
mermaid: what is it?
seawitch: you can’t speak thereby you can’t tell him what satisfies you.
mermaid: Oh F***!
June 6th, 2005 at 11:46 am
I believe Hans Christian Andersen was using the little mermaid a means of demonstrating how desire should not always be entertained.
Then again, everyone has their own desires for some unattainable thing or other, right?
A friend quoted me a line from Kama Sutra, it goes along the lines of: “a thing remains desirable only so long as it is out of reach”. What would you make of that?
June 6th, 2005 at 11:53 am
HAHA. orignal post~
cheers;)
June 6th, 2005 at 1:06 pm
I think need to rename this blog soon to “Mini(s) Disembodied Tales”. ROFL!:mrgreen:
June 6th, 2005 at 1:51 pm
Regrettably you should have taken mermaidology test first before getting everyone all confused now, about marine life. I prefer exactly the way they are today.
June 6th, 2005 at 1:53 pm
Forgot to add this anti-blow-up/pie-in-the-face icon. Here you are, just for you and to protect myself:
June 6th, 2005 at 1:58 pm
april: hahahahha yeah without a voice box the poor guy won’t even know if she’s happy or going yamate … eh?
tiger: goes to prove also that equality is an idealist’s dream… if there’s really such a thing as equality, we wouldn’t be on earth.
sarah: thanks! i hope you’ll keep your new room spick and span, though
dannyFoo: gah… cannot… this is not a story. this is a literary discussion.
doctor: hahaha… wtf is wrong with you, man?!
June 6th, 2005 at 2:31 pm
Eh…no voice also still can tell what satisfies you what….body language!! Heehee
June 6th, 2005 at 4:11 pm
and where got a crab goes around singing one?!?
and the portrayal of singing crabs is like crabism…
CRABS DON’T SING!! THEY JUST LIE AROUND WAITING TO BE COOKED AND FOR US TO EAT THEM!!
people being people never learn…
June 6th, 2005 at 4:53 pm
s-kay: still cannot lah… when she reaches her orgasmic high she’ll still look constipated and he’ll prolly think he’s hurting her when she’s actually having lots of fun. Takkan she keep laughing throughout the experience?
suanie: hahahaha i can imagine eating crabs that suddenly jump out of my plate and sing ‘UNDER THE SEA, UNDER THE SEA!!’ just like how i’ll leap up from my cinema seat singing ‘NEGARAKU TANAH TUMPAHNYA DARAHKU!’
June 6th, 2005 at 5:56 pm
My daily dose of jokes
World Shortest Fairy Tale: Once upon a time, a man asked a woman to marry him. She said, “No.” And he lived happily ever after!
June 6th, 2005 at 5:59 pm
yay! fairy tales are back!
June 6th, 2005 at 10:45 pm
I suddenly got a craving for fish. sushi anyone?
June 6th, 2005 at 11:26 pm
Seom fish do have wombs and stuff, and penis’s and stuff. Our godlfish give birth to live young. Surely Mermaids and Mermen would be mammals like Dolphins (Mermaids have boobs … so they are mammels!) So they’d have the same appareatus I woudl guess as Dolphins and Whales … and Dolphins have been known to be HORNY things! Humping anything which comes along, including undersea pips humans have left!
Poor dolphins, no hands or vibrators under the sea!
June 7th, 2005 at 8:43 am
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN:
The story wasn’t entire done in jest. there is a moral to it. but human beings like to skip over the important bits and skim through the fun parts only.
AIYOH why so like that?
sziang: uhuh, and?
vincent: wah lau so happy… next time must make you a star adi.
tormentt: if you’re treating me to fresh sashimi, i don’t mind really. bring it to the pps bash please.
dabido: yeah some fish mate like that but mermaids mate MY way. Its true.
June 7th, 2005 at 9:25 am
I am speechless.
June 7th, 2005 at 10:16 am
averil: awwww. come come. *pats averil’s head*
June 7th, 2005 at 12:54 pm
hey! love your blog!esp those bedtime stories! teehee! juz a random blog visiter.
June 7th, 2005 at 4:15 pm
lol. I will never look at mermaids the same way again.
June 7th, 2005 at 4:42 pm
I think one of those replies to Tormentt was ment for me Minishorts.
June 7th, 2005 at 7:49 pm
Arrr…I be salutin’ ye! Yer correct there girlie, lots of them landlubbers wish they were someone else. Misguided fools they be, arrrr. That’s why ye should always thank yer lucky stars ye are who ye are, sez I.
Unless it’s a pirate ye be wantin’ to be. Then ye’d be better off wishing, cuz there’s more to piratin’ than an eye-patch and a pegleg. Arrrrrr…
June 7th, 2005 at 10:15 pm
Not too sure if this is a collection of random thoughts or some hallucination that played out typical of a schizophrenia patient. By itself, they hardly make sense and they could hardly fit together. Here you are, a peek into the beautiful mind.
For my protection, here is the anti-fouled-mouth icon:
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