Yes, dear!

Friday, September 23rd, 2005 @ 10:06 am | Gender-bender

Eric's found a nifty way of getting me 'happy' everytime my bloody tai-yee-ma arrives.

Usually he's not very tolerant of me you see. I swear I can see him cursing under his breath, 'You stupid bitch' everytime I do something irrational. But I can't help it, its my idiotic hormones that will not listen to my sense!

I understand he suffers, I know its terrible, and I try to control myself. But I'm not sure what happens, cos the sensible me gets turned off and I morph into Miss Evil. Oh well. That's an overtold old story, where's the new?

'New' was the conversation we had the other day.

Me: It's soon.
Him: Oh fuck.
Me: Yeah I can tolerate words like that now, but during THAT time. No. All right?
Him: The bitch is arriving! Fuck!
Me: Can we try? Please?
Him: WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO? I'll be dead before … you turn into the good old girl I love…
Me: You love me regardless right?
Him: Yes, YOU! But … you won't be YOU! You will be the evil witch from hell YOU BITCH!
Me: You have to learn how to get rid of words like that you know. Be NICER? Hmmm?
Him: Like?
Me: Urm… ok… like instead of going 'what do you want', you have to pepper your vocabulary with nice soft words like, 'darling', 'honey', 'sweetie pie', 'baby'… liddat!
Him:Errr… errr…
Me: I think that's settled.
Him: Right… we shall see… (look of distrust on face)

All right. That's settled. At least. So I think.

The next time we spoke, it was over a meal.

Him: So what shall we order?
Me: Urm… anything lah.. you decide.
Him: I feel like having… cantonese fried hor fun.
Me: Urm… (pouts)
Him: Huh? Not okay?
Me: But but but… I just had that yesterday. (pouts)
Him:ma-hai
Me: What did you just say there?
Him: Errrr…. YES DARLING?
Me: What did you just say?
Him: NO NO-NO-NOTHING, DARLING!
Me: I heard, I swear I heard…
Him: Yes darling, no cantonese fried hor fun. What do you want then, DEAR?
Me: Urm… rice can or not?
Him: A bit full lah… can we not have rice? Let's order noodles.
Me: But I just had noodles in the morning and for lunch!
Him: Oh oh oh … OK DARLING… ANYTHING YOU WANT SWEETIE PIE… rice it is, HONEY…(big weird grin on face)
Me: You're not funny you know.
Him: Oh, darling, why not, sweetie pie?
Me: Eric…
Him: Yes , darling, you want rice, darling, we have rice then, baby.
Me: ERIC!
Him: What can I do for you, darling?
Me:ma-hai

Shit or not I ask you? Like this also can.

24 Responses to “Yes, dear!”

  1. - indra - Says:

    hilarious! hahahaha… ma-hai!

  2. ah pek Says:

    yah, shit. big shit. like that also can.

  3. totoro Says:

    i think this finally answers my question. i owe eric one.

  4. SaDdNesZ.jc Says:

    Hey, give the guy a break… We have to put up with you women every once a month, sometimes because you stress, TWICE!! can’t we reciprocate once in a year or something?

  5. Kyels Says:

    Wah..

    Sounds funny man. :mrgreen:

  6. ThatJames Says:

    :shock: The guy’s got a death wish.

  7. S-Kay Says:

    Dei…the monster’s visiting me soon..and Mr.BF went “Shit, go away you monster..go away, don’t disturb my girlfriend!!”

    And like Eric, he would also purposedly make ‘darling’, ‘baby’ or ‘honey’ sound extra weird because he will sengaja exxaggerate it and use it on every single sentence

  8. IgnorantAuthor Says:

    hah the monster’s always out to get someone..

    when im possessed i don have anyone to go darling and dearrrr so my friends end up screaming at me ‘you’re freaky enuff, but your aunty is so DAMN freaky!’ :oops:

  9. SaDdNesZ.jc Says:

    S-Kay: There’s a very good way to get the monster out of the way for a good 9 months…

    *Suggestive grin*

  10. Verne Says:

    HAHAHAHAHHAHA… that’s just hilarious minishorts..mauaahahhaha..damn, can’t stop laughing, ma hai!

  11. james Says:

    come on guys. girls had to have this every month and they had to bear the pain from birth and hassles from pregnancy and after pregnant. can u guys not be a snob! after pregnancy, u wan sex but never give time for wife to heal, only wan xxx only.. so simple for guys, just be nice to them and not in a sarcastic manner. Eric, pls treat minishorts nicely, truly from ur heart ok. no matter if she turn to evil, that is the person that you love. its just normal hormones that causing her to behave such way. ok.

    let end this lar.. :)

  12. S-Kay Says:

    saDdnesz.jc : That one..have to have license first lah :wink: but then hor, 9 months only..not enough lah…:lol:

  13. sing sing Says:

    oh dear minishort…lolzz…u have period crisis…and to eric….jz take the rice….after the dating, u can go other place else to have noodles…..

  14. Wingz Says:

    hahaha MAHAI!!

  15. ray_ Says:

    That’s no way to converse to your SO when the PMS monsta strikes.

    The answer to all those questions should have come instinctively. Like:

    “Let’s have rice.”
    “Yes maam!”

    “Do I look pretty?”
    “Like the morning sun (????)”

    “Do you love me?”
    “With all my heart”

    “If my dog were to sprout a zit on its butt would you bit it off to clear the puss”
    OK…that’s were you draw the line.

  16. cynical-idealist Says:

    Hehe, I love that excuse to go on a rampage once a month. But since no bf the trouble is shared amongst the guys frens I have online, and it’s nice to feel pampered by them.

  17. kenny Says:

    Ahahahaha.. so damn funny… XD
    mahai made me laugh until my stomach hurts..

    seriously la, give Eric a break. At least he’s trying ya? :???:

  18. Lainie Says:

    Date a girl la, then both of you can fight from equally crabby grounds. :twisted:

  19. Silencers Says:

    Eric rocks.

  20. Kim Says:

    He’s kewl…. Hehe

  21. Dabido (Teflon) Says:

    I think Eric is being very sweet as he’s trying to make you laugh. (And besides, he will probably be in trouble regardless of what he does, so he might as well try to make you laugh … even if the monster kills him in the process).

    So, hopefully both of you will be kind to each other.

    Hope it is not a bad month for you.

  22. w00ties Says:

    eric rocks. period. pun intended.

    rofl.:mrgreen:

  23. lishun Says:

    you’ve got to give eric credit for fitting in the “baby”s and “darling”s and “sweetie pie”s…lol. hilarious!

  24. baga Says:

    hahaha!! great pre-meal chat wif ur bf eh…hehe!!

Leave a Reply

Bad Behavior has blocked 2562 access attempts in the last 7 days.