Questions and answers (Part 1)
June's the first month in the year that I do not have to attend a wedding. But that doesn't spare me from the pestering question. Oh you know, the aunts, and the uncles, and the cousins, they're talking about it… and they're asking.
Remember when you were younger, maybe 10 or 11 or so, when you'd call your mother's sisters or brothers to say hello? And they'd ask you simple questions, like, 'How's school?' or 'Have you done your homework?' or 'When are you coming back to the kampung?'
Things don't change much as time flies. I still call home, and my aunt asks questions like, 'How's work?' and 'Have you completed your latest project?' and 'When are you coming back?' AND 'Are you bringing him with you?'
Two years ago I resigned to the fact that this annoying question about marriage will be a permanent guest till the day I actually do the honourable thing. I told my aunt, 'I might. Depends on whether he's got work or not.'
'You're going to bring this one back, then? You should you know? Put a little pressure on it, see if he's serious.'
'AIYOH…'
'HAHAHAHA Standard lah this question. You're going to get it until the big day comes.'
'AUNTIE!!'
'It's true, yah! I know you hate the question. But I just like to ask it.'
'Like that I'm not going to get married, ever. So stop asking.'
'CHEH! Don't talk nonsense there. Oh yeah, your elder cousin's getting the question too.'
She is? But she's married! She just got married last year.
'Married adi still have expectations to live up to, you know?'
'Like?'
'HAHAHAHA I tell you the story. We were on holiday, in Penang. And then you know lah, the big P arrived for your cousin. So funny, I tell you hahahah.'
'What's so funny?'
'Oh your cousin, she forgot to bring the essentials. We were at a Coffee Bean, and then halfway through coffee she sped off to the ladies, and when she came back, she said that she needed to go to a pharmacy or a kedai runcit to get some Whispers.'
'And then and then?'
'Hah her mother, your tai-yi lah, was so upset, she shouted so loud everyone looked up at her, "OH MY GOD! YOU'RE STILL USING WHISPER! OH GOD, WHY WHY WHY?!"…you get what I mean?'
To be honest, I didn't find it all that funny, what's this with Chinese families putting pressure on their daughters to perform the traditional duties. But, it was so silly I just HAD to laugh just to humour my aunt.
'So, dear girl,' my aunt continued. 'When this question 'when are you getting married' is finally answered, that's just not the end of it, okay? Just like your cousin, you're going to get another question, and that's FAR MORE DIFFICULT to handle hehe.'
June 2nd, 2006 at 8:51 am
You will never b able to get rid of questions from the family. One after another will continue to crop up.
June 2nd, 2006 at 10:08 am
Haha, like your cousin needs that announced to the whole world.
June 2nd, 2006 at 10:14 am
Tell me about it man…luckily my dad is kind enough to NOT allow me to endure the fusses his side of the relatives are making. They even busybodied till the point where they complained to my mom that we were watching too much TV. OMG. But my youngest sister had a mean question that she said she wished she could ask them,
“When are you gonna shut up”
Ganas.
June 2nd, 2006 at 11:24 am
wah sial. i open ur site tot that picture was u….
June 2nd, 2006 at 12:36 pm
I think maybe combining your hatred for being asked ‘When are you getting married?’ and your hatred for ‘Dooms Day Evangelists’ I can safely say that the day you can answer your Uncles and Aunties as to when you are getting married is the same day the Apocolypse occurs! [Or maybe I'm just being my usual silly self!]
June 2nd, 2006 at 3:28 pm
lemme get a step ahead by asking you…..when are you planning to have a baby???
then after the 1st one……when is the 2nd?
rinse, and repeat if necessary….
i am so mean…heh
June 2nd, 2006 at 7:19 pm
There’s something about Asian culture that insists on parents/uncles/aunts/cousins being the biological carriers of busy-body-ness… I’ve gone thru the same thing… from “when are you going to get married” to “when are you going to have kids”… it never ends… there must be some cultural conformity or kay-poh-city gene that’s peculiar to Asians, I think.
It does help, though, when your siblings already have kids ahead of you (and I’m the eldest), such that parents will be too busy minding their grandkids. So far, having grandkids seems to have take the pressure off of me! Ha,ha…
Then there’s always the over-eager matchmaker aunt (I believe there’s one in every family), who didn’t stop EVEN after I got married…
Maybe one day biologists will finally discover the Kay-Poh gene. Or better yet, a cure for it!
June 4th, 2006 at 11:15 am
I thought it was a pic of you too! Hahaha!
Yeah, right now, I’m still getting all the “when’s your turn (to get married)” shit. Like I’m so tempted to ask “when is my turn? (to come to your funeral). Bleh!
Then there will be “when’s your turn (to have a baby)
Then there will be “when’s your turn (for a second baby)
And it will go on and on and on…
June 5th, 2006 at 12:12 am
wah hey!! i know this is totally unrelated to the post but thanks so much for posting me up on your blog… am totally honoured
you literally saved me from hitting rock bottom with my self esteem!
marriage is a pretty freaky thing….
June 5th, 2006 at 9:56 am
Eh, so when are you getting married?
June 7th, 2006 at 12:27 am
i…didn’t get the cousin thing…..
can someone please shed some light?
June 10th, 2006 at 1:18 pm
Nice dress
June 10th, 2006 at 2:10 pm
Wow minishorts seems to have become much bigger.