Eric just called.

Eric: Dear, I bought something that you will enjoy tonight, very much.
Me: What? What izzit?
Eric: I bought something long, and thick.
Me: Heh? What is it???? TELLL!!!!
Eric: Well, it's long, its thick….
Me: …
Eric: And you can put it inside your body….
Me: Eh… what did you buy lah…
Eric: It's something for you… that you will enjoy very much…
Me: …
Eric: Do you know what is long, and thick and something that you can put inside you?
Me: Eh… don't tell me…
Eric: hmmm?
Me: EH YOU BOUGHT ME A DILDO?????
Eric: HAhahahahha… well….
Me: EH how can you buy me a dildo?
Eric: Why can't I buy you a dildo?
Me: Because… I cannot … and I don't… won't… don't want to….
Eric: Well, you never try, you never know… plus you will enjoy it very much lah…
Me: BUT I CANNOT!!! HOW CAN YOU BUY ME A DILDO?

Eric: Hahahahahahha no lah… not a dildo lah you hamsap… I bought you a Swiss Roll.

Me: -_-"