Comments on: To what extent.

By: Lisa

Lisa — Fri, 01 Dec 2006 07:56:22 +0000

People who only ‘learn’ how to compromise in a relationship never really knew how to compromise at all.

People in relationships are generally nicer because they are HAPPIER, not because they’ve learned to compromise.

And sometimes, people think they are compromising, but actually they’re still being the bitch they are and it’s really the other half that’s doing all the bending.

Not that I’m mentioning any names

By: rijac

rijac — Thu, 30 Nov 2006 06:34:26 +0000

hmm…. the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence… i know many singles who are dying to get into a relationship… and many married folks who are dying to get out of their relationships…

go figure!

By: Mei

Mei — Wed, 29 Nov 2006 05:09:31 +0000

DK: IMHO, everyone is smart in some ways and dumb in others. My partner is not the best person to approach when it comes to linguistics and EQ – so you could say he’s dumb in that sense. He’s also jobless at the moment. Am I going to dump him? No.

Really, I find a number of men say they don’t mind that a woman is smarter/richer but at the end of the day, it becomes a contributing factor to problems in the relationship. I truly hope that yours is not the case.

Wealth and brains are not the only factors in deciding if a person is desirable as a life partner. Attitude and heart are, to me, more important.

By: DK

DK — Wed, 29 Nov 2006 02:44:00 +0000

Mubby, Mei: But is a gal willing to accept someone who is poorer/dumber than her?

Personally, I don’t mind gals who are richer/smarter than me.

By: eliz

eliz — Wed, 29 Nov 2006 01:08:27 +0000

i agree that “perfect match” doesnt exist… should i or should i not compromise? if yes, to what extent? i’ve decided to stop asking myself questions like this. so far, i’m still not sick of him and i still cannot live without him.

By: Mei

Mei — Wed, 29 Nov 2006 00:49:54 +0000

Mubby: Some guys find it harder to compromise and accept girls who are richer/smarter. Hm.

Me? I draw the line between compromise and being abused + used like a doormat. While change is good, there is such a thing as “one sided change” and “hypocrisy” – the whole “this is your fault. you should adapt to me!” and blah, blah. I see it all the time in relationships – budding and dying.

Relationships are about growing together, laughing together and hurting together BUT if the pain and suffering is more than the joy, why be in one?

By: mubby

mubby — Tue, 28 Nov 2006 23:17:57 +0000

Hmmm… to me it always seems like the girl is expected to compromise more, because she is expected (to a certain extent) to follow the guy’s decision.

Annoying but I think this is true: the more successful (academically, financially, bleah) a gal is, the harder it is for her to first enter into a relationship… a theory me and my friends like to call “the existance of the alpha male asian ego.”

By: Emmanuel

Emmanuel — Tue, 28 Nov 2006 20:27:22 +0000

That , to me would simply translate to how much you love your other half and how much would you be willing to give up for that person.

By: Ricky

Ricky — Tue, 28 Nov 2006 19:33:17 +0000

Well some people have never had a girlfriend so to answer that question one would have to be in a relationship or have had been in a relationship before. Being single is not so bad, but it takes some getting used to. It helps to have a job though and to be financially independent. And then you can just use that money to treat yourself once in a while.

By: Lainie

Lainie — Tue, 28 Nov 2006 14:42:33 +0000

i’d say there’s definitely a threshold, it’s normally what happens after it’s been crossed.
i tend to go numb.