just minishorts.

Note this. Please read my blog  before you decide that I AM A CELEBRITY BLOGGER. I am not a blogger actually. Definitely not a celebrity. Oh this? This is a place where I write whatever I want to write. I use a content management system to jot down random thoughts. In my mind's eye, no one is reading this. I don't care about companies, I don't care about products, I definitely don't actually care about attending lots and lots of functions to become 'famous'.

In a past life I used to partner with some companies and organizations to support their profit-driven causes. I sometimes do that, if I feel like it. Usually it happens only because of the following reasons:

1. I know the PR agent / marketing brains behind the product /co  owner as a friend, so the post is written as a favour.
2. The PR agent / marketing brains behind the product/ co owner took a lot of time to 'get to know me' as a person first so he became a friend, and then I was compelled to have an intention to do the person a favour.
3. I bought / experienced the product / service, somewhere, somehow, and I decided I wanted to talk to about, and I decided that I would do it here.

Someone asked me, if you don't do ads and stuff, then why do you do Nuffnang? Pick one of the reasons above. same thing.

I don't care about your company, I don't care about your product. I don't even care if I lose my readers, andneither do I care whether I get pregnant this month (I digress,  don't mind me, is the married woman syndrome). The point is, I write whatever I write and I don't think anyone actually bothers, but I do care that my mailbox is stuffed with stupid invitations, and requests of 'hey I like your blog can you visit my blog and give me your opinion?'

I am an elitist and always will be one. The times I regret the most in my life are the times when I was lapping up all the 'publicity' and offered interviews, talking about my blog of all things. It's taken me months, years to get rid of the stereotype that has become me. I am trying hard, so forgive me if I get boring. But leave me out of your functions, and freebie giveaway lists. I'm a PR Consultant myself, and trust me, I know there are better ways to get creative.

Be a little more hardworking will ya? PR is not about compiling lists of e-mail addresses and massmailing everybody each time you have a 'massive event'.

There's a reason why I'm so reluctant to add strangers on Facebook.The first is because, I am active on facebook – meaning I log on at least once a day, and I do read the status updates, and strangers' updates mean nothing to me because I can't connect.

The other part is largely due to my desire to find people I can *sync* with. Adding strangers usually come with that 'ice-breaking' stage, and it includes effort and work before a proper friendship can be formed. What this means, to me, is that if you wanna be my friend, you have got to be a good conversationalist. It means that you have got to have the ability to tune in to my radar. In the same way, I must be able to do the same too.

Now of course this doesn't in anyway mean that I talk to all the hundred of friends listed on my FB. But the thing about people who write in to request, 'Hi, can I be friend?' is this: they're very keen on communicating. The bigger problem is this: they don't know how to communicate. So therein lies the problem – there is no chemistry. There is, this whole desire on the other person's part to pull me (or anyone who's experienced this before) into a pointless exchange.

EG. I hate facebook polls. New friends – omg, can you please not run polls on me? And even if you do, isn't it possible for the polls to have more *intelligent* questions. Stuff like, 'Do you think Claire Khoo will get married?' or 'Do you think Claire Khoo likes dating?' is totally -DUH-. Conversation starters in my inbox like, 'Hi wanna be friend',  is completely devoid of sincerity and presumes a very shallow burst off and I – the atas elitist, don't like wasting time. That's  why I delete, I block, I ignore.

And I don't like talking to people who only talk about politics and whose onlyinterest is to bash up the government and talk about how stupid UMNO / MCA is. See it isn't that I love Barisan Nasional to death – but I see the situation as a 'what is right now'. Coming from the perspective of a Christian, I believe that we're called to love whateverwe have, and its our responsible to work within the boundaries of our given situations – for the best. Complaining all the time about our stupid government (even though, yes I totally agree that they are stupid), is a waste of precious time. I just don't like being kopitiam naysayers because it takes away the intellect of living in this world.

And I happen to like my intellect a little too much to waste time on strangers. Thats why.

*ps. Adding this video cos it's too good not to share!!*

I'm about to head back to work after a month of chilling it at home, and while it means that prior to the wedding I'll be working (unlike many people who take about two weeks off before their big day to do the preparation), I'm actually looking forward to it. At least it means that I'll get to be preoccupied with what I call, the things that matter.

Having the extra hours to myself during this holiday-period obviously gave me a lot more time to catch up on good ol' blog-surfing. My memory of the Malaysian blogosphere has always been a comfortable virtual hangout where diverse characters who share the common love of expressing themselves via their writing or their photography can build friendships and extend their networks. While my work requires me to be somewhat disengaged from that society, I've always treasured whatever little time I get to spend with these people, and I've been very flattered whenever I find out that people still know who I am. Or the old friends whom I used to hang out with blogger bashing on MSN Live Messenger, still know me, and we can go beyond the niceties and still throw the familiar names around.

My holiday surfing season has been a strange experience. It feels a bit like returning home to Kota Bharu after, five years of not visiting, and being unable to swallow in the massive structure near the Kelantan River that screams 'TESCO'. Perhaps its because I recall some of the old over-the-chat bitching where we used to point fingers at wannabes, and we would cry folly when idiots pretend to be print journalists. It was the whole 'we wanna make the blogosphere' a commendable medium thing that made it fun. There was healthy competition, we bloggers the underdogs and then them 'journos' who made a living out of writing for the more reliable print media. Healthy because we never crossed the line in bashing each other, at least not then.

Now its different lah. It's really, really strangely odd to see how bloggers who used to go 'yay yay I'm featured in the Star' even thought its just a single word-mention, are now going 'Fuck NST they  used my blog and they never even credit me and the links they give me are pathetic'. Alas the old elitist in me has yet to shrivel off, and since I've never been an apologist for being somewhat judgemental and definitely holier-than-your-average-deity, I'm here thinking, 'OMG what the hell did fame do to you?'

Two years back I'd probably be up in bounds and blurting a whole lot of profanities (mostly for fun) and bashing up such strange characters, but right now, maybe its because I got older and my own wedding is taking up so much of my time (and of course, I'm inwardly gloating because FINALLY I'm going to be married and tsk tsk you're not muahhahah), I'm just going to say that Thank God my life took another direction and thank God I'm just a simple old plain Jane who's looking forward to slaving it out in the marketplace once again.

Gawd damn it… of all times to GAIN FREAKING WEIGHT, I gain weight NOW! And it happened in an obscenely short time!

The Benchmark – to fit into the Carven dress that I bought off the shelves a few months back.

Every two weeks since I've had that dress, I've diligently taken it out of the wardrobe and wore it around the house to make sure I felt comfortable walking around in it. And for the past five – six months, there has never been any problems with the size of the dress. In fact, a little less than two weeks ago, I tried it on and it was a little looser than usual, I had to stuff up my chest with little tissue folds to make sure it wouldn't fall off my boobs.

And then, MY aunt came to town, and my mom happy went, 'You should see the dress that our little girl bought, she looks great in it…. Go, girl, go and try it for your aunty to see…'

So I went like Mama's good girl and slipped myself into the long uncomfortable piece, and then as usual, pulled the zip up my back… except, this time, the zip wouldn't go up after the small of my back.

'Girl? You ok in there? Ok or not? Come out quick lah!'

'Wait wait…'

'Cannot wear izzit? YOU GOT FAT AH?'

'No no cannot zip… hands got cramped up I think…' and I SERIOUSLY thought so, so I let my aunt and my mom into the room so that they could help.

'Errr… I think cannot lah. Must alter. Too tight, cannot zip up adi.'

'Can one Ma, try, last week when I tried it on it was too loose…' I said.

'Too loose so you EAT SO MUCH IZZIT?' my mom started, and then she turned to her sister, 'How can pull it up or not?'

'Errr… ' my aunt tried. 'Better not push it, we don't want the dress to BURST okay!'

OF ALL FREAKING TIMES, I GAIN WEIGHT ONE MONTH BEFORE THE WEDDING! HELP HELP HELP!!!

FACE YOUR MANGA!!!

Foung this very nifty website a while ago, and now I get to make a whole set of new avatars for my facebook!

 Man, its been a long long time since I found stuff like this on the web.